Gone but not forgotten (I hope)

This hottie up above is Skyler Cooper. Yes, she is FEMALE. Yes, those muscles look oh so right! I love a butch lesbian!

It’s been a while I know. For that I’ve got to apologize. Been so dang gone busy! I’m actually trying to write a book and since I’m about done with it, I started getting to work on the submissions package (sample chapters, query letters) and I’ve been driving myself nuts spending almost any bit of free time I have, editing, re-editing, scraping, re-writing, the damn thing over and over again.

When I get into something is that I OBSESS over it. Can’t see or think about anything else. So yeah my poor blog got neglected! Not only that but all the hot lesbo’s I’ve been stalking online have been going without my devoted, obsessive, attention!! You poor dears!! Don’t worry I’ll carve out more time to bask in your lovely, fabulousness now. Lol!.

I even had a new crush, this cute punk chef I found on allrecepies.com. I haven’t even gone on the site to stare at her pictures every five minutes and comment about how tasty her cakes look. *WOLFISH GRIN* Honestly romance has been the last thing on my mind as of late. I need money, so chasing girls is going to have to take a back seat for a while.

In addition to work I’ve been having people stay over my apt and just like…living here…until I’ve had to call the police on them. Yes, THE POLICE. My mom stayed for like a week and then she went home, all was amicable. But my sons father had gotten kicked out of his family’s home and has been renting a room from some lady with like four kids. I think it’s poetic justice, actually. He couldn’t be bothered to take care of his one child and ends up having to live and cater to a woman with 4 of them. LOL! But he says he wants to spend time with our son so I allowed him to stay in my apartment (sleeping on the sofa or in my sons room) for a few days. A few days turned into nearly a week! Partially my fault because I’d turned him into my personal slave, which was really, really fun! Men are so good at domestic chores and cooking, especially when they are in the dog house for being complete turds and know it. I made him clean the entire apartment and cook all our meals the whole time he was here. Plus since he said he was here to spend time with our son I made him stay with our son while I gave myself a break, went out and did stuff. Of course, I knew the good boy act was going to come to an end and I was going to have to kick him out. The day before he was going to leave anyway he started to act like he was the one who paid rent in the apartment and I was the one begging him for a place to stay. Then when I asked him to leave a day early because all the sudden he couldn’t be bothered to clean up after himself or tend to our son, he threatens to punch me! The two of us have scrapped before, which is one of the main reasons he is my ex, however I never called the police on him. I figured if I just get away and got my own place everything would be fine. He didn’t touch me this time, just seriously threatened to and held his fist in the air. Sick. Men are always trying to bully women into getting what they want. I guess I had enough of it and called the cops and had them come early in the morning (while my son was still asleep thank god!) and have him escorted O.U.T. Enough of that shit.

I think about when I was in a relationship with him and think about the fact that it’s been a very long time since I’ve been in a relationship with a guy. You almost forget how they try to use their physical power to intimidate and control you. I suppose this has never been a relative problem for me because I’ve always been the type of girl who has no problems getting into a physical fight. I read this article yesterday on not spanking your children and all the research that says spanking a child has negative effects on that child. A lot of men commented on this and were kind of outraged, they saw spankings from their parents as part of what made them “men”. Well, where does that put girl children, Like me, who were spanked when they were children? For me I think it made me less afraid of physical violence from men or women. I hate to fight but if I have to fight, I totally will. In fact, I realize that in the midst of fighting there’s this strange exhilaration that comes over me. There’s no pain during the fight, it’s after the fight the hurting starts.

But the things I did in my teens and early 20’s are no longer so appealing to me now. I grew up in Brooklyn, New York, I went to inner city schools and a public high school. I had a mother who had no problem with spanking me as a child. Hell I been fighting all my life. I guess for a while I didn’t see anything wrong with it. I knew it was wrong for men to hit women, I knew it because people always said it was. But I didn’t see it as wrong really, because I stayed with an abusive asshole for too long and truth be told, up until I called the cops the other day, I’d been protecting him. Even though I left him and haven’t had sex with him or anyone of his gender since I left him, I still had been covering for him by not making him face the truth of his actions. So I finally did that and he’s mad at me. LOL! Which is so adorable…I mean after all of this the fool honestly hopes that I still care.

Speaking of abusive assholes, I found out that a girl I almost dated is now in love with a MAN. EWW! What kills me is she was such a man hater and in so much emotional turmoil over this girl at the time we were flirting with each other. She was a pretty boy-girl (just like I like ‘em) problem was she was kind of a flake and still in love with her “ex-girlfriend”. I only knew about this from reading her blog where while we were planning to “meet up”, “hang out” and “do STUFF” (sex) she’d be obsessing over her “ex” in post after post. I really didn’t care that she was in love with her ex, I just wanted to smoke pot, watch some movies and have sex. I’d just broken up with my girlfriend at the time (except I actually stayed away from her) and didn’t want anything too heavy. No one coming over and cooking big family meals with, no one playing catch and foot ball with my son, no one to plan a family with (or decide on the race of the man we wanted to get knocked up by) , figure out how we’re going to afford an apartment in the city to raise our happy little lesbian family with. I’d done all that with my ex girlfriend (and we decided I’d get knocked up by a dark skinned Hispanic male) , wasn’t in the mood to start from scratch. How chauvinistic of me, I just wanted someone nice to look at to have sex with.

But, you know, just be honest about shit. If I did fall for this girl how much would it have sucked for me that she’s still not over her ex? So I called her out of her weirdness and we got into a huge fight. Haven’t talked to each other since (actually we did, we talked again when we found each other on a dating network. Except I didn’t know it was her until she started going on about the same “ex girlfriend”. This is almost a year after our first contact) but I had her on one of my e-mail IM list still. Come to find out she writes a status where she brags about being in love with someone. I check out the post to see who’s the lucky girl and she’s kissing a guy in the picture. LOL! Man is he ever in for it.

Oh in other lesbian drama news another girl that I almost dated has been bugging me in IM, apparently trying to show off her new relationship. I hate when people do that! We were talking for a minute but she’d say some weird shit to me like how she googled me and knows where I live in shit. I told her I’ve dated psycho’s before and didn’t like it, and she claimed to just be kidding, but who kids about stuff like that? We’re talking about like basketball or something and all the sudden she breaks out with: “Yeah I googled your name and found out where you live. You live only a few blocks from me. I’ve been WATCHING YOU…”

Then I spent like a week in the hospital and when I called her to let her know I’m alright, she’s like all pissed off at me “Where the FUCK were YOU AT?” OMG! Psycho! After that I pretty much ignored her. So for a while it seems like she gets the message and has been leaving me alone but recently she starts IM’ing me to see how I’m doing. So I’m nice to her and figure I’ll let bygones be bygones but I’m still not interested in dating her and she keeps mentioning her new girlfriend. Well be talking about kids and she’ll mention her new girlfriends two kids and how cute they are. Then we’ll be talking about a movie and she’ll mention how much her girlfriend wants to see that movie. I’ll be talking about food and she’ll mention how her girlfriend cooks it better then anyone. OMFG! Not this shit again! LOL! Seriously, I’m happy for anyone who finds love. I know how hard it is and I’m pretty confident that someone amazing is out there for me, so I’m not stressed and I am not the jealous type. And the fact that some people don’t seem to want to talk to me unless they have a relationship to try to jam down my throat just means they’ve been thinking about me and I must have hurt them worst then I imagined by declining a relationship with them. So it’s just a total ego boost for me that they really care, this much. Actually my sons father tried to pull the same shit on me. When he was over at my place he kept calling his “girlfriend” and talking real loud on the phone with her. When I was in the kitchen making a snack he even mentions me to her in my face. He said something like “Yeah, I told my sons mother that but she never listens to me”. Awww!! How cute, you’re trying to make me jealous! Except I really am a peculiar girl, when I break up with someone I make sure I have good reason too. Michael Jackson is dead ya’ll, ain’t no one should be sliding backwards anymore. I’m ready to move forward. Thanks for gassing my ego though!

A little courage in a small East Texas town

I went to college in Texas – San Antonio in fact. Spent 4 1/2 years there and gladly called it home at the time. My partner and I called Houston home for 2 years. Both cities have a thriving if not quaint gay population. But drive a few hours over to a small east texas town called Tyler or neighboring Lindale – and you get a different tale. Very conservative, very bible belt and extremely homophobic. I think I would go so far as to say the very word “gay” is not even utter in single breath in that town (okay maybe I am exaggerating but you get the point) – it isn’t very welcoming to gay people at all.

Tyler Texas - Project TAG

In comes the AIDS service organization Project TAG (Tyler Area Gays) who decided to do a small part to introducing this community to the word “gay.” What did they do – they adopted a highway. We all have seen the signs, church groups, fraternities, lodges – adopt a section of a highway, clean it up and get their name put on a sign on that stretch of road. Project TAG sought to do this with the idea of getting the word “gay” out in public in their community. The hope – to desensitize the area about what is and is not “gay” and to get the community talking. Will it work…only time will tell. But I think it’s a great way to not only do a service for your community but to show how LGBT people have the same civic and community goals as anyone else and oh by the way; they live in your town too!!

Way to go Project TAG – that takes a lot of courage in this little small east Texas town.

Thomas

They're totally doing it.

WorkChucks was right. Drew Barrymore and Ellen Page are TOTALLY BANGING. I don’t think they’re dating, I just think they enjoy each other’s “company” quite a bit.

Look at that love connection.

It also appears that Drew and Ellen share my affinity for constant touching and/or shows of affection. They can’t go anywhere without cuddling, holding hands, or kissing. Not that I mind…

Girls Just Want to Have Fun...

Dear Ms. Mix & Bitch,

I feel as if I’m dying a slow death out here in the suburbs.  The answer for me, however, is not moving to a big city.  I’ve been married for 15 years to an amazing man that I love very much.  The problem is, I realized a few years into our marriage that I also am attracted to women.  I told him so, and he’s fine with it, although I never acted on it. 

Then I met Laura through a business networking event.  She’s smart and funny, cute and also a lesbian.  We’ve become good friends, and she has let me know point blank that she wants me for her own.  I’m torn because I love my husband.  I’m attracted to my husband and we have a healthy sex life.  But I have this other side of me which needs to be fed.  What do I do?

Signed,

Love Him or Her?

Dear Love Him or Her,

Well, pardon the expression, but you’re in a bit of a pickle now aren’t ya? It sounds to me like you’re true blue, full-blooded bisexual woman.  Congratulations – you’ve doubled your chances for a date on a Saturday night (old Woody Allen joke). 

So what to do? Well, the good news is that your husband already knows – although understanding your wife’s a bisexual intellectually is a hell of a lot different than having her say, “Ok now, I’m off to find a girlfriend!” First things first, sit down and talk with him.  Tell him about your feelings of a ’slow death in the burbs’.  You both need to figure out what’s going to work for both of you.  Is an open marriage the way for you two to go? Can he really handle the idea of you with a woman on a consistent basis? And can you handle him being with other people? 

If an open marriage won’t work for him, and you can’t stay in the confines of monogomy, then you two may need to separate temporarily.  I’d hate to see that happen, but this is obviously a huge part of yourself you feel you need to express. It’s not going to “go away.”  Just talk to each other about it because keeping it inside will indeed eat at your soul.

Oh – one more thingy – don’t expect Laura to want to play the third wheel on your open marriage bandwagon.  She’s playing in full uniform for the other team, meaning, just because she wants to plow your field doesn’t mean she’ll compromise what she wants to get you.  Or maybe she will.  But before you ‘go there’ you need to lay it all out for your husband.  He’s the one you made vows to years ago. You also need to think about if it’s Laura you really want, or has she just been a catalyst for your coming out party.  I’m sure sharing all this with your man sounds about as appealing as root canal without the good drugs, but it’s gotta be done.  Otherwise, you’ll end up acting out this stuff and really hurting him.  And you.

BTW, this is the most literal, obvious mix I’ve ever made. Couldn’t help it – sorry!

10.  “I Kissed a Girl,”  (Katy Perry)  I Kissed a Girl (Single).

09.  “Damn I Wish I was Your Lover,”  (Sophie B. Hawkins)   The Best of Sophie B. Hawkins.

08.  “Glory Box,”  (Portishead) Dummy.

07.  “Fidelity,”  (Regina Spektor) Begin to Hope.

06.  “I Always Knew,”  (Jem)  Down to Earth.

05.  “Your Little Secret,” (Melissa Etheridge) Your Little Secret.

04.  “I Want Your (Hands on Me),” (Sinead O’Connor) So Far.

03.  “I Melt with You,”  (Nouvelle Vague)  Nouvelle Vague.

02.  “A&E,”  (Goldfrapp) Seventh Tree.

01.  “Got to Be Real,”  (Cheryl Lynn)  Cheryl Lynn.

I just wanna BE OK, BE OK, BE OK

Johanna’s in tha houze!! Yeah, you heard me. I’m here. Having a blast while Michelle’s out peeing Rosco…not really. I already miss Michelles company. Anyhoo, I’m going to tell you a bit of my day and then you can comment about yours! That sounds pretty darn funny, eh? No, prolly not.

This day started with me waking up and going to work. One of my instructors is a colortechnician so she wanted to try out these new haircolors on me. So I thought, hey why not? So my haircolor is now red/orange/yellow/purple! I know it sounds a bit..weird but I can promise you this; I’m hot as hell.

Now Michelle’s back and we’re going to have lots and LOTS of fun. Not in a sexual way. Bye!

Yeah, Michelle’s here!!! As in, Michelle’s speaking. It’s not Johanna, ICH SWEARS. Anywho, about the whole “not in a sexual way” it was a big, fat lie. I’m not saying I’M LESBO, but she’s bigger than me, and could easily rape me if she wanted to. But you can’t rape the willing, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

An Injury to One Is an Injury to All

Republished with Ron Jacobs permission

["An injury to one is an injury to all" was a slogan of the anarchist labor union the IWW, commonly referred to as the Wobblies.]

Dissident Voice – USA
http://dissidentvoice.org/2009/09/an-injury-to-one-is-an-injury-to-all/

An Interview With Sherry Wolf

by Ron Jacobs / September 29th, 2009

On October 11th, 2009, a march billed as the National March for Equality will take place in Washington, DC. The organizers of the march are organizing under a single demand: “Equal protection in all matters governed by civil law in all 50 states.” Their website states their philosophy in an equally succinct manner: “As members of every race, class, faith, and community, we see the struggle for LGBT equality as part of a larger movement for peace and social justice.” One of the speakers at the march will be author and organizer Sherry
Wolf. As I wrote in a review of her recently released book Sexuality and Socialism: “No other work that comes to my mind explains the history of sexuality and sexual repression in the United States as comprehensively and compellingly.” Wolf is currently touring the United States talking about her book and organizing for the October 11th march. I was able to get in touch with her while she was in Boston and we had the following email exchange.

Ron Jacobs: Hi Sherry. To begin, can you tell the readers about the March for Equality? What is the impetus behind it? Who put out the original call?

Sherry Wolf: David Mixner, who worked as an Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender (LBGT) liaison in the Clinton administration and Cleve Jones, Harvey Milk’s collaborator and who launched the Names Project AIDS Quilt, put out the call for this march back in June. It was met with horror and opposition from many of the more established, corporate financed national LGBT groups. However, with momentum building at the grassroots, organizations such as Human Rights Campaign and NGLTF thankfully came on board, though they do not run the organizing efforts nor are they shaping the program. This march will not be brought to you by Miller Beer or Citibank!

The (mostly) younger activists at the forefront of mobilizing this march online and on campuses and in communities are sick of the gradualist approach that has dominated our movement for years. The single demand for full equality for all LGBT people in all matters governed by civil law really strikes a chord with activists such as myself and this new generation who find the incrementalist—state-by-state, issue-by-issue—strategy of the LGBT establishment to be a failed one.

RJ: I know that in your book Sexuality and Socialism you talk about the corporatization of the Gay Pride movement and its concurrent moving away from an identification with other disenfranchised and oppressed groups in the US. What would you say is the political identity this march hopes to put forth to the people of the United States?

SW: In a sense, the initiative for this march only underscores the ramifications of my arguments in Sexuality and Socialism. No more crumbs. Enough going hat in hand to Congress and waiting for some tweak in the laws. We want it all!

I got involved in helping to organize this march because I simply find it unendurable that gay politicians like Barney Frank are among the first to argue that demanding equality for LGBT people is the third rail of American politics. This march is about seeking, essentially, to be added to the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and have all of our rights respected once and for all.

We will have the NAACP’s Julian Bond, UNITE Here’s John Wilhelm, young, multiracial new activists like Aiyi’nah Ford, transgender militants and myself, an unabashed socialist, speaking at this march. Though Lady Gaga and Cyndi Lauper will be playing and speaking, this is not a Hollywood choreographed affair—it has a shoestring budget and will give expression to this new combative mood and anti-corporate sentiment

RJ: To me, the transformation of much of the Left of the 1960s and ’70s from universal movements into a collection of smaller groups fighting their own particular oppression and for their own piece of the American pie is a big part of why the US Left is where it’s at now — where Democrats are considered socialists. Is this phenomenon (which I consider to ultimately be the result of identity politics gone wild) present in the movement for equality? How should leftists counteract this when it appears?

SW: [The first part of your question is answered above, I believe]

I travel a great deal and speak to small and large audiences from Bellingham, WA to Gainesville, FL and I think that those old school ideas are on the wane—in particular among working-class people and those not attending elite universities. The language of Identity politics persists, in a sense, because a new culture and outlook are still embryonic. But when striking Teamsters (Latino and white, all straight) attended an event in Chicago two weeks ago where Cleve Jones spoke to 250+ people about going to the march, everyone was
electrified. The workers gave solidarity to our struggle and the LGBT activists are lending solidarity to their pickets. The May Day protests in many cities this year had LGBT activists carrying rainbow flags—the contingent in Los Angeles where I was that day was very well received by immigrant families.

It’s becoming clearer to more people that the old labor slogan is true: An Injury to One is an Injury to All!

RJ: As you know, I live in North Carolina. Outside of Asheville and a few of the larger cities, there exists a quite obvious homophobia. One sees it on church message boards and bumperstickers and one hears it on the radio and so-called Christian television. This intolerance is quite obvious and, as Beth Sherouse wrote quite articulately in an article that appeared in Counterpunch on August 31, 2009, the fact of this obvious hatred and fear is one reason why LBGT equality must be recognized on a national scale. In her article, she reminds the readers of the federal role in helping end desegregation. Yet, there is another side to that story. The federal government also allowed and encouraged not only segregation, but also fought attempts to roll it back for a long time. I guess my question is — while it is important that federal legislation forbidding discrimination against persons
based on their sexuality be passed, how does the equality movement see any such legislation being enforced?

SW: Beth is right and after reading her piece I made it a priority to add more Southern stops on my current speaking tour. If you look at polls one year after the Virginia v. Loving case ended laws preventing Blacks and whites from marrying in 1967, only 20 percent of whites in the U.S. supported biracial marriages. We obviously can’t wait for bigots to come around before passing equal protections for LGBT people. However, it was the ongoing organizing, teach-ins, marches, rallies and even just the posture of Blacks in this country that altered the political climate.

Today, around 80 percent of all Americans—and more than 95 percent of young people—approve of interracial marriages, according to Gallup. A climate of intolerance to anti-gay and anti-trans bigotry can be advanced by students and workers—regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. All progressives must bring these issues into organizing efforts beyond the LGBT movement—inject them into union contracts, workplace organizing, budget fightbacks, campus mobilizations and immigrant defense campaigns. After all, most LGBT people ARE workers, immigrants, Black, Brown and all these other identities as well. In other words, lesbians have to pay the rent too.

RJ: In your book you insist on the need for the LBGT rights movement to link up with other oppressed groups in the US and fight for all of these groups’ freedom. I was wondering if in your organizing work for the October 11-12 March on Washington, do you see any attempts by other organizers to expand the call to all oppressed groups? Or is there a tendency to limit the organizing to LBGT people? If so, can you explain why you think this is so?

SW: We made a conscious decision not to create a laundry list of demands, but to have one single demand for equality in all matters covered by civil law in all 50 states. The veteran activists involved, myself included, want to strike while the iron’s hot. There is a spirit of struggle among young LGBT people who came of age thinking AIDS isn’t the mass killer that it is and who are waking up after Prop 8 to the fact that our rights are completely dispensable, where they even exist. We can still be legally fired, or not hired, in most states for our sexual orientation and/or gender identities.

Arizona’s governor, for example, just ditched domestic partner benefits. Ohio’s Representative, Lynn R. Wachtmann, some neanderthal from the 75th District wrote to LGBT activists, “If sexual orientation and gender identity and expression are added as protected classes, all those who do not identify themselves in accordance with this lifestyle choice will be discriminated against.” I have never been a single-issue activist in my life — I’m a socialist after all — but at some point we must unequivocally demand an end to this crap once and
for all.

I’m 44, I came of age AFTER Stonewall and before Generation Twitter, I’m from the generation nobody ever bothered to name. I’ve participated in, and in some cases helped lead or initiate divestment campaigns, antiwar, anti-police brutality, pro-abortion, pro-single-payer health care, anti-budget cuts, pro-labor fights, etc. for 26 years. There’s finally a broad fight for LGBT equality and I’d be insane not to leap in with full-force and try to help make it a success.

My greatest hope out of this march is not simply that we win our demand, but that in a poetic reversal of history other struggles take a page from our initiative and mobilize to make demands of the Obama administration. The Stonewall generation had fought for Black civil rights, women’s liberation, against the Vietnam War and, for many, alongside Cesar Chavez for farm laborers for many years before they ever mobilized for their own rights. This time around, it may be possible that through a quirk of history the LGBT struggle could lead
the way for others to ratchet up a fight for genuine universal health care, jobs and an end to the wars and occupations abroad.

RJ: I love it — “the generation nobody bothered to name.” Anyhow, any insights on how the organizing is going? How can people get on board and organize in their community?

SW: The Web site for the march www.nationalequalitymarch.com has a dizzying array of downloadable materials. Go to the site, get the facts, post flyers, send out tweets, post it to Facebook, and by all means everyone should get themselves to the march if they can. Obama has shown that without mass pressure he won’t deliver what we need and want. This march punctuates a turning point of sorts for the LGBT struggle—people who miss out on this protest for civil rights will kick themselves afterwards. Don’t kick yourselves, just come.

RJ: Thanks, Sherry.

–
Ron Jacobs is the author of The Way The Wind Blew: A History of the Weather Underground. His most recent novel Short Order Frame Up is published by Mainstay Press. He can be reached at:  rjacobs3625@charter.net.
Sherry Wolf is the author of– Sexuality and Socialism: History, Politics, and Theory of LGBT Liberation

© 2009 Dissident Voice and respective authors

30/09/2009 GFest 09: word is getting out, BIG Thanks to you all!

GFest 09 publicity is going out. The generosity of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Trans (LGBT) people and friends of GFest, who are re-tweeting & sharing the GFest 09 programme announcement on social media (Twitter/ Facebook/ Myspace / Digg etc.), is almost touching and is certainly exemplary.

A Big thank you to you all (I hope you’re reading this) for your kind help in spreading a word at this time,  since as a small arts charity,  we are greatly relying upon your generous support in making GFest 09 as successful as the last few years.

If 100 of you send a word amongst your 100 friends, GFest news or London’s LGBT cross art festival news can easily reach to 10 K people.

Please keep up the good work & let’s all ensure that great quality and the news of LGBT arts reaches to maximum number of people.

———————————————————————————————————————————–

GFest – gayWise LGBT Arts Festival (known in short as GFest), London’s Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender cross-art festival.GFest09pressads

GFest 09 dates: 9 to 22 November 2009.

GFest is organised by arts charity Wise Thoughts. GFest 09 is supported by venues, community partners and the Mayor of London.

WISE THOUGHTS / GFest – gayWise LGBT Arts Festival www.wisethoughts.org / www.gaywisefestival.org.uk

Obama's Nomination Of Chai Feldblum To The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

Obama has nominated far-left homosexual rights advocate Chai Feldblum to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) – a move that makes Congress’ new push to pass the anti-faith ENDA bill even more dangerous to the rights of Christians.

Consider this…

Not only is Feldblum a former legal counsel for the ACLU and the pro-homosexual Human Rights Campaign, she is a CO-AUTHOR of the ENDA bill that she could soon be enforcing!

And what is Feldblum’s agenda?

Incredibly, Feldblum says that when there is a conflict between religious freedom and homosexual rights, “…society should come down on the side of protecting identity liberty of LGBT people” (LGBT stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgendered).

In this view, YOUR religious beliefs will take second place to someone else’s desire for aberrant sexual activities or gender changes!

She opposed a case in which a Christian couple who owned a bed and breakfast in Vermont and who refused to participate in a same-sex union ceremony in their own home.

Feldblum stated: “Thus, for all my sympathy for the evangelical Christian couple who wish to run a bed and breakfast from which they can exclude unmarried straight couples and all gay couples, this is a point where I believe an inevitable choice between liberties must come into play. In making that choice, I believe society should come down on the side of protecting identity liberty of LGBT people.” Unbelievable!

In Feldblum’s desired workplace, Bob the receptionist can wear a dress and lipstick to work and designate his restroom of choice, yet the owner of the business – even a Christian business owner – will not be able to say a thing about it!

If this latest Obama nominee has her way, even the Boy Scouts would not be able to protect its young members from contact with openly homosexual leaders…

Feldblum is on record as saying that the Boy Scouts should not have won their case at the United States Supreme Court that affirmed their right to free association.

Feldblum and ENDA will put every employee, business owners and even churches and non-profit ministries on the wrong side of the law

The nomination of Chai Feldblum makes the ENDA battle in Congress even more critical. If she is confirmed and ENDA is passed, we should brace ourselves for the most radical, anti-faith interpretation of this bill that is even possible.

Obama’s nomination of Chai Feldblum is no accident. This is all part of a strategic plan to advance a radical, anti-faith, anti-marriage agenda.

Only the Left would even attempt to pass such a radical law and then give the architect of that law enforcement powers!

We have exposed their strategy. Now, we must stand.

Gay news; Calender of horrors, hospital should be ashamed, Canadian gays unfairly detained in Dubai

 

A new calender comes out for 2010 that will not be featured in many gay households for sure or maybe only as dartboard. It’s called Great American Conservative Woman calendar and features beauty queen Carrie Prejean, hate monger Ann Coulter and bigot Senator Michele Bachmann. Barf, barf, barf.

  The Federal Court dismissed the lawsuit from a lesbian mother, Jessica Langbehn,(who could not be with her dying girlfriend) against Jackson Memorial Hospital in Miami. Her girlfriend suffered an aneurysm on a Rosie cruise and even after a power of attorney naming Langbehn was sent to the hospital, she was still refused access to her partner. She was only able to see her partner when a priest was giving last rites. According to the Federal Court the hospital did not have any obligation to let Langbehn see het partner. I only have one word for this, ridiculous.

A gay couple was detained for 28 days in Dubai for having arthritis drugs with them. The couple was only staying one day in UAE after being on vacation in India and before flying back to Toronto. The custom official probably thought they were gonna be partying in Dubai and that this was drugs to do that with. Both men were not given a chance to contact a lawyer, slept on a filthy prison floor and were held an additional 11 days after being declared innocent!!. A good reason to never visit Dubai, no matter how cool it might be!

The "Other Side"?

S.O.S. PLEASE, SOMEONE HELP ME! Exactly the emotions I had when this bit of information fell into our lap. Sources say that Rihanna & her assistant, Melissa, are more than just … ya know. The two were spotted vacationing overseas, engaging in PDAs. They actually look cute together, but that’s beside the point. Focus kids. Do I believe this? No. However, if it did turn out to be fact not fiction, I wouldn’t be surprised. This seems to be the new trend among young girls her age. And even younger for that matter. Hell, for older broads my age as well. Homosexuality seems to be the NEW drug; a coping defense mechanism. That New escape when you can’t deal with what life has dealt you. No disrespect to true blue authentic genuine members of the Gay, Lesbian, Bi-Sexual Transgendered Community. However, the mere fact that folks are just instantaneously “realizing” they’re gay these days has to raise concerns. How you went to work today straight, came back from lunch GAY! My man left me: I’m lesbian. Can’t pay my bills this month: Gay 4 Pay Lesbian. My train was late for work this morning: I’m a LESBIAN!!! WTF??? Come On Now! And if I were Lesbian I’d be tight right about now. The nerve of someone experimenting with my emotions and taking my body on a bullsh*t test run. Making the whole Gay experience seem like a joke & a farce. I don’t begrudge anyone for feeling how they feel, or loving who they love. But I thing we better start using our heads and making wise decisions. If this is truly nothing, then it’s just that- nothing. However, if there’s some truth to this, then I wish Rihanna & Melissa well. But know this: Different does NOT mean Better. Different Is Just Different!

-”The BklynBandette”. Mr. Hollywood’s Co-Defendant.

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Dancing with Myself

It is a Friday evening on a summer afternoon. The workday is over, and I am not scheduled on my second job tonight. Taking this rare opportunity for free-time in hand, I lay my plans for an evening out on the town. I walk past my cell phone that is sitting on its charger beside the door. I see that it has neither calls nor messages waiting, and I smile. There are no invitations to cookouts or social gatherings or anything. More importantly, there are no calls from adoring women desiring my company. The night is mine.
I pop a David Sandborn CD into my computer, to set the mood, and begin undressing for a quick shower. Sandborn’s smooth saxophone sounds fill my apartment as warm, soapy water washes over my fatigued body. I look down at my midsection and notice the bulge that is gleaming in the shower spray. No, not that bulge-I’m referring to the roll of fat that has accumulated around my abdominal area. I remind myself to eat more veggies and do more crunches.
I towel-dry my hair, pat-dry my body, and exit the steamy shower stall. After donning my newest pair of boxer shorts, I rifle through the closet looking for something comfortable, yet classy. I decide on khaki cargo shorts and a blue-plaid oxford shirt worn over a black tee. My gray and white Nikes complete the ensemble. These days, I dress for comfort rather than style.
Dressed and ready, I head for the front door with my head reeling with a myriad of different visual images. Wait, I just remembered that the Sandborn CD is still playing and the bathroom light is still on. After discharging these two trifles, I once more begin my journey.
I stop and turn. Gotta check the stove. Although I haven’t used the stove today, I still feel compelled to check it. I walk into the kitchen while pondering the dynamics of laser-light (which has nothing to do with kitchen appliances). I look down at the stove dials. They are all set in the “off” position, but I still feel compelled to touch each one as if needing tactile reassurance.
I once again start on my way. I’ve gotten so far as to turn the lock when it occurs to me that I was daydreaming about laser-light while checking the stove. What if I possibly turned on all the eyes while in my absentminded state? I return to the kitchen and recheck the dials, once again touching each one. Once I am sure that everything about the stove is copacetic, I bolt for the front door.
I slam it behind me and lock it with one of the two sets of house keys that I carry. The outside air is hot and humid and smells like car exhaust. I wonder how many toxins that I’m breathing in as I make my way down the stairs. I’m almost at the bottom of the second landing when I remember that I’ve forgotten my cell phone. I have to go back.

I’m in my car now, pulling out onto the road that leads to North Johnson City. My musical taste has progress from David Sandborn to the Ramones. With the refrain of Teenage Lobotomy blaring in my ears and the air-conditioning blowing cool on my face, I make my way through the post-rush hour traffic. I can already taste the savory popcorn shrimp at my favorite seafood place.
As I leave West Market Street and enter the parkway, I realize that I have been lost in my inner world from the time I left my apartment until this point. I shut off the stereo and try to orient myself to my surroundings. Not sure if I stopped for the last red-light, I anxiously scan my rearview mirror for pursuing police cars or traffic pile-ups left in my wake. When everything looks clear, I breathe a sigh of relief and continue toward my destination.

It is still early enough in the evening that the restaurant is not yet crowded. I enter the lobby and approach a smiling young hostess standing behind a podium.
“How many in your party, sir?” she asks with feigned enthusiasm.
“Just one” I reply.
“You’re dining alone?” she asks.
“Yes, ma’am” I say.
She draws her mouth down into sad frown that displays her pity and makes a low sound like one who is consoling a child with a boo-boo. I, in return, furrow my brow and offer her my best look of distain for her youthful ignorance. She simply ignores the gesture and cheerfully chirps, “Okay, follow me, sir.”
Although there are many tables unoccupied and available, she leads me to a small, single-chaired one in a dingy corner next to the men’s bathroom.
“May I have a table next to the window, ma’am” I ask.
She hesitates and looks around with an expression as if I have just asked to borrow her car for a day and asks “One of the larger tables?”
“Yes, please”
“Um…okay”
She leads me to my table of choice, tells me that my server will be with me soon, and leaves me to enjoy my coveted dining table. The view from the window is Spartan, with only some scraggly trees and a mechanic’s garage in the distance. It isn’t much, but I’ve fought for it and won it. The table is mine.
I am staring out the window, wondering if city trees are as healthy as country trees, when my waiter approaches my table and says, “Hey there, bud, what can I get you to drink?”
‘Bud’, I think to myself, whatever happened to those professional courtesies like sir and ma’am?
“I’ll have a sweet tea, no lemon” I reply.
Meanwhile, he leaves me to peruse the menu as he goes to get my tea. After a very brief period of debate, I decide on Alaskan whitefish and popcorn shrimp with French-fries. A glass of iced tea is suddenly shoved into my field of vision, and the first thing I notice is a large lemon slice bobbing in the center of it. I decide that I can live with lemon, and pull it out with my fingers and lay it on the table.
“Ready to order there, bud?”
I raise my eyes to face my waiter who is standing with pencil and pad in hand, impatiently waiting to take my order. I give him the details of my order, hoping that he won’t screw it up as easily as he did the iced tea. He jots down some notes on his grease-splattered pad, runs a hand through his bushy surfer’s hair, and takes the menu from me.
“Have it out to you in just a minute, bud” he says with a half smile, then leaves me to sip on my lemon-contaminated tea.

It is now 9:15pm, and I have just left the restaurant and am I now on my way to my favorite night club. The place which I am bound for is the city’s most identifiable gay and lesbian establishment. I go there sometimes, not for one-nighters, but for the sensory input. I love the bright lights, loud music, and the constant motion of mingling forms.
As I pull into the rear parking lot, my first observation is that there are but few cars around. I then realize that it is still too early-the crowds do not start rolling in until after ten o’clock or so. The place is a nondescript building with a whitewashed clapboard exterior that is conspicuously void of any windows. It is not much to look at from the outside. What it does look like is a structure trying to hide itself and its business.
I climb the wooden staircase that is surrounded by a high privacy fence, slowly amble down the concealed walkway, and enter where the front desk is to my immediate right. Rhetta is one the establishments most prominent staffers. Upon seeing me from behind her desk, she greeted me in her usual officious manner. After the briefest of chitchat, she checks my drivers’ license and stamps the back of my hand.
“I don’t know why I bother to stamp your hand-you never drink”, she says, and then turns back to her previous work.
I am briefly taken aback by the offhand comment. First of all, because I think these are the most words that she has ever spoken to me at one time. But it also surprises me that she knows so much about my personal consumption. Evidently Rhetta is more observant than otherwise thought, and I now have a newfound respect for her observation and recall skills.
I by-pass the lobby and head straight to the bar across from the empty dance floor. The bartender is talking with two flamboyantly dressed boys and a transsexual man. I take my place in a visible spot, but instead of catching the bartender’s attention, only the transsexual acknowledges me with a flirtatious smile. I nod a dispassionate hello to him and lean on the bar to get the bartender’s attention. He finally turns to me and takes my order-a cherry coke in a glass, alcohol-free.
The bartender is a very muscular man with sandy blonde hair and very effeminate body language. In addition to being a bartender, he is also one of the club’s lead bouncers. When I first discovered this long ago, I laughed, thinking that he would scream like a girl if confronted. I have since learned differently after having gotten to know him. He can handle himself quite effectively in a scuffle- as many a quarrelsome patron has come to discover.
I settle into a very uncomfortable stool near the dance floor and sip my cherry coke while letting my eyes follow the gyrating lights. The effect is almost mesmerizing. Meanwhile, more patrons have entered the club. I watch as they start to shuffle past me.
A young man with boyish features, evidently inebriated, begins to stagger sideways in my direction. I instinctively raise a hand to deflect the impending collision when his companion, a middle-aged gentleman, reels him back on track. Relieved, I go back to sipping my cherry coke and enjoying the light-show.
Soon, the younger and the older man are dancing together. The younger man is doing most of the dancing. The older man is struggling desperately to stabilize him.
I turn my attention to the other areas of the club, debating whether to go sit in the den with its big comfy chairs or the balcony with its commanding view. As I am debating, I suddenly become aware of frenetic movement to my right. It is the young, inebriated man dancing at my side. I’m thinking that at this point he seems determined to fall upon me.
He doesn’t fall on me though. Instead he smiles, winks at me, and begins removing articles of his clothing. Shirtless, he moves toward me and begins rubbing his lean buttocks against my outer leg. I am flattered, but not interested. For a moment, I am frozen with shock, not really certain how to respond to this impromptu lap dance.
Suddenly, his elder companion grabs him brutishly and jerks him away. He gives me his most fierce “bitch-I’ll-scratch-your-eyes-out” look and drags his younger companion back to the dance floor. I laugh in bewildered amusement.
During this time, I have decided upon relocating to the balcony-the farthest point from the dancing duo. As I make my way across the club, an extended remix of a Village People song is playing. I resist the urge to mouth the words to “Macho Man”. Instead, I climb the short stairway to the balcony section and sit down in a swivel chair that is unexpectedly comfortable. I lean upon the metal railing and watch the figures below as they sway, circle, dodge, and interact.
I soon find myself falling asleep against the rail’s cool metal. So, I make my way back across the club toward the bar to fetch another cherry coke. Perhaps the caffeine will offset my post-prandial sluggishness. I make it barely three-fourths of the way there when I feel hands upon my shoulders and pressure against my back. My first thought is that it is one of my few acquaintances with whom I bother to associate. Nope, it’s the inebriated young man again. Once again he is disrobing and trying to gyrate against me.
The older companion once again grabs him vigorously, this time forcing him down into a nearby chair. He turns to accost me but, but I am now gone. I am lost in the crowd and on my way to retrieve my coveted cherry coke.

With my drink in hand, I am now sitting quietly on a bedraggled sofa in the club’s lounge. The muted thump of the music echoes from the dance floor. The rhythm is broken only occasionally by the excited howl of a patron. I notice that I am surrounded by groups and couples that are both straight and gay. They seem to be taking no notice of me-and that’s the way I like it.
Something suddenly crashes down hard against my left side. It is the amorous young drunkard again. With his head resting upon my shoulder, he looks at me with his wide, blue eyes and unashamedly asks, “Can I see your penis?”
I look at him more with pity than disgust. He has phrased the question in much the same way as a child may innocently ask for a cookie. I am forced to repress my urge to snicker at the unseemly request.
“No”, I say firmly, but with a kind intonation.
“Why not?”
“It wouldn’t be proper.”
“No one here cares. Really, they don’t.” He whines. And then to my chagrin he to turns the strangers seated around us and loudly asks, “You guys don’t care if he shows me his penis, do you?”
The crowd suddenly erupts into astonished, howling laughter. The once oblivious patrons are now taking an active interest in my personal business. Even Rhetta has put out her cigarette and stepped out among us to see the commotion.
I realize it is time to leave.
The enraged, middle-aged companion is suddenly standing before us with his face contorted in anger.
“And just what do you think you’re doing?” he hisses. I am not sure if the question is directed at the young man or at me.
The angry companion pulls his young lover up to his feet by the arm, and begins pushing him toward the exit.
“C’mon, I’m taking you home!” he barks.
The young man turns to me one last time, and with despondent eyes asks, “Please let me see your penis”
“Maybe next time”, I tease.
“No, neeeeever!” the companion hisses, making a clawing gesture at the air in front of me.
The two of them stager out the exit and disappear. And, once again, I am left to enjoy my solitude. I consider returning to the balcony and watching the drag show which is soon to commence. But, a wave of fatigue has suddenly overtaken me, and I decide instead to just go home.
The thump of the speakers and the sounds of wild mirth fade as I exit the club. It then occurs to me that I am leaving a lonely place for a place of aloneness. Loneliness is not a matter of how many people surround us. It is not something to be quantified on a mathematical basis. But rather, it is about how we relate to ourselves. All the physical presences in the world cannot comfort us until we make friends with that one stranger that we call our self.

I arrive home a little after midnight. The building is quiet except for the low, mechanical hum of the air conditioner. I sit upon my futon, drinking in the silence with a glass of skim milk. I realize that I am happier at this moment than at any time during the course of the evening. Having made friends with myself long ago, I enjoy my own company best. Here, in my home, there is nothing complicated to figure out. There are only the familiar things that make me happy.

Orgy Sex Parties 7

Title Orgy Sex Parties 7 Genres All Sex, Orgy, Threesome, Lesbian Actors Claudia Valentine, Emma Cummings, Hollie Stevens, Layna Laurel, Missy Stone, Regan Reese, Satine Pheonix, Trina Michaels Studio Pink Visual Review Pack a room full of unbidden bitches and a collection of big, hard dicks for them to fuck and what do you get? Orgy Sex Parties 7! Once this bevy of beauties gets done playing with each other’s firm tits and succulent splits, they move on to getting triple-stuffed with Bunyanesque boners until their pussies, mouths and aching assholes have been fucked red and raw!

Connie's Thoughts

9/28/09
A marathon, 26.2 miles… running… at one time… in one day… in a few hours even. My longest run I have done at the current date is 6 miles.. and that was 2 days ago! Chris and I talked about the possibility of running a marathon and then all of a sudden we were signed up for one. My thoughts… crazy, insane, challenging, long, painful… doing this with the love of my life- FUN!

Our First Marathon: A whim to reality.

I’ll be the first to admit that I can be an extremist. When I was 29 years old I decided to thru-hike the Appalachian Trail from Georgia to Maine, 2163 miles in a season. No one I knew thought I could do it. I did it. I also decided to jump out of an airplane, and proceeded to get and AFF freefall license..(20 jumps).  I kind of lucked out in that I recently (2 years ago) I married a woman who was kind of a closet extremist.

The thing I love about my marriage and my wife, is that I can usually convince Connie to go along with my crazy ideas…I’ll suggest something for us to accomplish. I’ll sign us up, and then Connie has a way of making us see it through. We’re a perfect team really. The last thing we did (September 13th of this year) was a sprint triathlon, we have done this twice. The time before that was a 120 mile bike ride that took place in one, yes ONE day, we did this twice. My bum has never been the same. Now I’ve gotten us into a Marathon. 26.2 miles. It happened by accident really.

My intention was to sign us up for the Disney World “HALF” marathon. It was full. It came as no surprise to Connie when I said “let’s just do the whole thing.” She agreed and I signed us up.  That was a week ago.  Since then, we have begun running a lot.  We are researching marathon training programs, airline tickets, lodging options, nutrition programs, hydrations options, running shoes, sports watches, online training logs, running clubs and blister protection.  We believe we have what it takes to finish a marathon.  26.2 miles.  My goal is to not only have my eye on the goal of finishing, but to be present in every moment leading up to it.  I have never used the word “Runner” in any context to describe myself, ever.  In this moment, from here forward, “I am a runner.”

Science Fiction meets Religious Oppression

So many people who hear me talk about the Ex-Gay Movement and my many varied failed attempts to “de-gay” myself think I am making this stuff up–total fiction. Add to it the Evangelical world view,  some evil spirits, generational curses and football clinics–well it sounds downright nutty.

Daniel Gonzales writing for Box Turtle Bulletin, spent time trying to de-gay himself with the assistance of a “therapist” from the sinister sounding organization NARTH (National Association for the Research and Therapy of  Homosexuality). Recently he has been looking into the parallels between ex-gay treatment like one gets at NARTH and elsewhere with the practices of another infamous organization–the Church of Scientology.

He’s included delicious diagrams and videos. Read Part I and Part II of a Clear Comparison: Scientology and Ex-Gay Programs.

NARTH will have their annual conference this year in Southern Florida, and like last year when NARTH met in Denver, Beyond Ex-Gay will be there to counter the misinformation and false promises. Beyond Ex-Gay will facilitate a day-long Ex-Gay Survivor gathering for survivors and allies. It is the kick-off for an event organized by a coalition of social justice groups. As NARTH meets to share their views about just how awful the gays are and their various dodgy methods to bring about change the Anti-Heterosexism Conference will take place down the road in West Palm Beach, FL Nov 20-23.

National Equality March, October 10–11

March for LGBTQ Equality

The National Equality March just got its march route permit approved—awesome! Organized by Equality Across America, the goal of the march is simple: “Equal protection for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people in all matters governed by civil law in all 50 states. Now.” I’d add “queer” to the LGBT in that sentence, but overall, amen.

Organizers Cleve Jones, David Mixner, and Dustin Lance Black have all been hard at work publicizing the march. In coverage leading up to the event, there’s been some debate about the march—Is it worth putting time and energy into the march (which will occur while Congress is out of session) that could go toward legal and political advocacy work? Will it effectively achieve anything? I hold the point of view well articulated by Kate Childs Graham in “Advocacy v. activism: both/and, not either/or“: both advocacy and activism are essential. We need hard work to change laws, strong education to enlighten the ignorant and apathetic, and strong voices to demand LGBTQ equality.

Will you be at the march? Michelangelo Signorile will. Check out his piece from the Advocate, “Why I’m Marching.” I unfortunately can’t be there (though I will be in spirit).

Can’t make it to the March? Take time that weekend to brainstorm on what you can do to work for LGBTQ equality (and if you’re already are hard at work on that, consider if there’s a little bit more you could do). Talk to your friends and family. Make a plan of action. Become a super-queero in your own community and join Project Yay Gay (also check out Be Yr Own Queero). And learn how to get involved with and support organizations like the following:

• Civil Rights Front
• Empire State Pride Agenda
• The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN)
• National Gay and Lesbian Task Force
• Lambda Legal
• Empowering Spirits Foundation
• The Dallas Principles
• Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD)
• MassEquality
• Family Acceptance Project
• Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG)
• The Trevor Project.

There’s a ton more, too—bring on the recommendations! And keep up on LGBTQ news over at Pam’s House Blend (please suggest other LGBTQ news sources, too!).

telling the parents

Brooke finally did it, she told her parents she was making a big old lesbian baby with me.  And it went well. Brooke spent the last week down in Tampa at her mom and step dads while her dad flew down to also spend time with her and her brother.  Brooke was beyond petrified to tell her mother and I never quite figured out why. Even though her mom has had trouble with us in the past she has seemed to accept us and her dad is pretty laid back, we figured would be a non-issue. Well oddly enough her mom was thrilled while her dad didn’t have much to say.  Her step dad had put two and two together and just assumed we would be doing that. Barb, her mom, is really excited and can’t wait to be a grandma much like my mom. Barb herself has a 6-year-old, so not surprising she likes the little ones around. As it is Barb and Tim, her husband, live in Tampa with Brookes brother and half sister.  While her dad lives in Minnesota. The entire family never comes out to visit us. We always have to be the ones to go visit them. And of course Brooke and I resent it. Brooke gets the guilt trip when it’s been too long and I worry about money.  We are lucky in the fact that my family lives near us, but I feel if they didn’t my mom would always find reasons to visit. So, with this future baby they are excited about we are hoping that they will start visiting us. We will definitely see. I am also hoping for Brookes sake that her dad will start getting excited and maybe even move out here.

What I find interesting is that for some reason people think that because we are making a baby via insemination rather than the good old fashion way we can pick the sex of the baby. Both her father and step dad asked if we were going to pick. It just goes to show how much people really don’t know what it’s like in other peoples shoes. So many people have been surprised on all we have to go through to get my name on the birth certificate and the fact that I will still have to adopt the baby. I don’t want to say it’s ignorance, why would they have to know these things if it does not affect them? But I feel this contributes to how people vote on such things in elections. Lately on my way home for work there has been an anti-domestic partnership sign.  It says protect marriage protect our children man + woman= marriage.  On so many levels this sign angers me. One domestic partnership is not marriage and can be entered into by a heterosexual couple. Two how the hell is that endangering to children or even marriage for that fact.  Am I going to turn neighbor children gay by getting partnered with Brooke. The way marriage is now I have no respect for it. I rarely see successful marriages and Brooke and I have had no desire to get married. We have decided to take advantage of domestic partnerships in Oregon which was still a big decision.  However, that decision came from the desire to protect our future child and family and it was the only way I could have my name on the birth certificate. I know more gay couples that have been together long term over heterosexuals. I am not saying it doesn’t exist I’m just saying that the whole idea of marriage doesn’t prove much. All we want out of the idea is to protect each other and our child.  I work with children for a living and not once have I ever endangered them. If anything I have taught them people are different and it doesn’t make them bad. I can’t blame it on religion for these people, I grew up in a Catholic school.  What I remember as being the most valuable thing I learned was in third grade when my teacher told us everyone was different and it didn’t matter what religion or what color or whatever someone else was, we were all the same in the eyes of God.

I worry what kind of world we are wanting to bring a child into. I wonder where so much hate and anger comes from. I wonder what makes people hate because of the color of their skin or because who they love. I wonder why fear drives so many people and why parents force their ideals on children. In some ways I have hope for children. More children find it normal for someone to have two mommies or two daddies. I feel the earlier they see it the more normal it is. There is no reason for a child to hate someone because of color or religion or sexuality, someone has to tell them it’s not right. Those are the people I worry about.

New Research Studies LGBTQ Grantmaking in Minnesota

Over the past year, Funders for LGBTQ Issues (formerly Funders for Lesbian and Gay Issues) partnered with the LGBT Funders Network of the Minnesota Council on Foundations to take a look at foundation giving to Minnesota’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) community.

The recently released report, “State of Funding: LGBTQ Grantmaking in Minnesota,” provides a benchmark that measures and describes this giving.

Among the key findings:

• In 2007, 29 Minnesota foundations awarded $1.1 million across 88 grants to 33 LGBTQ organizations and programs in Minnesota. In comparison, nationally 293 foundations granted $77.2 million in 3,206 grants.
• Private foundations accounted for 72 percent of Minnesota grantmaking dollars to LGBTQ issues in 2007. The five foundations that awarded the most dollars were: Kevin J. Mossier Foundation; Bush Foundation; The Jay & Rose Phillips Family Foundation; AHS Foundation; Otto Bremer Foundation. The five foundations that awarded the most grants were: PFund Foundation; Kevin J. Mossier Foundation; U.S. Bancorp Foundation; John Larsen Foundation; Headwaters Foundation for Justice.
• The study lists the top five LGBTQ strategies supported by Minnesota grantmakers as: 1) Advocacy; 2) Direct Service; 3) Organizational capacity building; 4) Litigation; 5) Community Organizing.
• The top five issues supported in 2007 were: 1) Community building/empowerment; 2) Civil rights; 3) Philanthropic infrastructure; 4) Strengthening families; 5) Health.

Robert Espinoza, director of research and communications for Funders for LGBTQ Issues, presented the findings at a convening of the LGBT Funders Network on Sept. 25 in Minneapolis. A copy of the full report (pdf) is located on the MCF website. A report on funding trends at the national level is also available at the Funders for LGBTQ Issues website.

- Chris Murakami Noonan, MCF communications associate

Ohio Trans Day of Remembrance Vigil

From RememberingOurDead.org.

The 11th annual Transgender Day of Remembrance vigil will be held Nov. 19, at 7 p.m. in King Avenue Methodist Church in Columbus. The event is sponsored by Buckeye Region Anti-Violence Organization and TransOhio.

According to a press release for the event: “The Transgender Day of Remembrance is intended to raise public awareness of hate crimes against transgender people, an action that current media doesn’t perform. Day of Remembrance publicly mourns and honors the lives of transgender people who might otherwise be forgotten. Through the vigil, we express love and respect in the face of national indifference and hatred. Day of Remembrance gives transgender people and their allies a chance to step forward and stand in vigil, memorializing those who have died by anti-transgender violence.”

A list of the deaths known to the media and/or trans community is available at RememberingOurDead.org.

Music Moment: Amanda Palmer, Surprisingly More Thought-Provoking Than I Suspected

Well, dang, Amanda Palmer, I did not expect this entry to turn out like this when I began writing. I always thought you rated as talented and fun, but not always for me, but once I had to start pondering you, I began to wonder if it might be that you hit a little too close to home? So thanks?

Amanda Palmer – Runs in the Family

“With me, well, I’m well,
well, I mean, I’m in hell,
well, I still have my health,
at least that’s what they tell me.
If wellness is this,
what in hell’s name is sickness,
but business is business
and business runs in the family…”

Here is a link to the official video for this really excellent track from her LP Who Killed Amanda Palmer, available through Roadrunner Records and produced by Ben Folds (also the album art is by Neil Gaiman … because they are dating, which I cannot comprehend). I’m not crazy about the video, so I’m not embedding it here. I think her showy, fitful histrionics kind of rob the song of its natural jumpiness and make it almost less nerve-wracking.

Amanda began her career with the Dresden Dolls, about whom the wiki has this nugget to say which for me says it all:
The two describe their style as “Brechtian punk cabaret”, a phrase invented by Palmer because she was “terrified” that the press would invent a name that “would involve the word gothic.” The Dresden Dolls are part of an underground dark cabaret movement that started gaining momentum in the early 1990s.

Brecht, punk, cabaret — I find these to be overused words, I stigmatize them because they drip with deliberate intellect, I kind of sneer at them, okay? However, that’s hypocritical as hell because I used terms like “dark cabaret” yesterday in describing Annie. Or is it? I don’t know because the Dresden Dolls never struck the right notes for me personally. I found them too … pat in their spin, in their self-styling. I should have loved them, being a fan of weirdness and steampunk and tinkly music and frankly some also pretty dark shit, you know, wink wink SEXWISE, is what I mean! …

I realized these Music Moment posts tend to run really long because I like music way too much, and can’t bear to only give you half the story on someone I think is really special, so click here to keep reading about Amanda Palmer and my queer little problems with her.

… but despite even our common kinks, I just never could get into them.

I am much fonder of Amanda Palmer’s wilder and I think maybe more heartfelt solo work, although I still find her onstage personality and even her videos a tough sell, which I am trying to wrap my mind around even as I admit it.

I guess I like a waifish, lost girl, which is not the persona that Amanda Palmer espouses as her stage self, whatever she is like personally. I don’t know if I identify better with that more overtly femme and even vulnerable type of hurt-me-save-me-just-pay-attention personality and so love them for that reason, or if they somehow awaken in me a perversely opposite number, like, “I will handle being the busty, snarky one, here, I will be the tomboy who barges in and solves your problems, you just sit there and look pretty and let me occasionally wreck you because sometimes your weakness makes me want to mercilessly stomp you ’til you squirm even as I recognize my own propensity for the same which only makes me want to beat you all the harder.”

Like, which even is it? I have no idea, because I can embody either at the flip of a coin. I am a piece of shit at the consistent feminist thing. I really suck at it. I flounder through it like I do every other social position of note, because I am no good at really sitting and admitting for sure what I feel about my identity, or where it fits in to the broader set of women as a whole.

In fact, I was downright miffed by this video for “What’s the Use of Wondrin’,” my favorite Amanda Palmer song, featuring Annie Clark who was yesterday’s Music Moment artist. I love this song because it is a purely creepy cover that brings out the underlying horror of the message of submission in the original song from the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical Carousel! (emphasis theirs. not mine).

Amanda Palmer – What’s the Use of Wondrin’? feat. Annie Clark

Listen to the song without those images, and see how different it is. I hate this video because it makes a mockery of that position, of that hard-won submission. What the hell do you know about it, Amanda “Bossypants” Palmer? Just because being all riotous and shit comes to you naturally doesn’t mean the rest of us can’t find a sick pleasure in loving the wrong person, or even loving the right person in a really fucked up way. Is it so wrong to want to be totally taken care of, to for once in your life count on someone and allow them to set clear boundaries the transgression of which may occasionally result in punishment? (Oh, my god, I think I just heard Gloria Steinem’s jet start … yep, she is coming to get me…) But by the same token, I have to admit that I liked how weird and creepy the song was all along because I did recognize how ironically terrible its message was. So, I can’t have it both ways forever. Which is it going to be? We’ll see, I guess. “So when he wants your kisses,
you will give them to the lad,
and anywhere he leads you,
you will walk.
And anytime he needs you,
you’ll go running there like mad;
you’re his girl
and he’s your fella
and all the rest is talk.”

Can Same-Sex Couples Get a Divorce in Tennessee?

The Associated Press reports that an Indiana court has refused to grant a divorce to a same-sex married couple.  In this case, the couple had married in Canada and eventually moved to South Bend, Indiana, where they are now seeking a divorce.  The Indiana court is refusing to hear the case because the marriage is illegal under Indiana law.

What about Tennessee, could a same-sex married couple be divorced here?

Divorce is a remedy that may be awarded by a court.  Tennessee uses a fault-based system for dissolving a marriage.  This means that in order to be awarded a divorce, you must prove to the court that either your spouse has acted in a way that gives you adequate grounds for divorce, or that irreconcilable differences have arisen between the parties.

Either way, the award of a divorce is only appropriate if a marriage had actually existed between the parties.  The question is then, would this couple’s marriage be valid in Tennessee?  After a much publicized battle and vote, our state constitution was amended to read:

The historical institution and legal contract solemnizing the relationship of one (1) man and one (1) woman shall be the only legally recognized marital contract in this state. Any policy or law or judicial interpretation, purporting to define marriage as anything other than the historical institution and legal contract between one (1) man and one (1) woman, is contrary to the public policy of this state and shall be void and unenforceable in Tennessee. If another state or foreign jurisdiction issues a license for persons to marry and if such marriage is prohibited in this state by the provisions of this section, then the marriage shall be void and unenforceable in this state.

It may seem unfair, but since Tennessee cannot recognize a same-sex marriage, the courts cannot award a judgment of divorce to these couples.  This is exactly the same situation as in Indiana.

casting shadows: free story erotic horror (part 3)

Come visit us over at Pen Flourish, the erotica imprint of Drollerie Press. Today, the free erotic horror story, Casting Shadows, concludes, and you may find the climax, although satisfying, is not what you expected.

Erotic horror not your cup of tea? How about a draught of literary erotica? The Green Hour is literary erotica that confounds bad choices with good liquor — and offers a nice helping of Rimbaud on the side.

Casting Shadows: A sensual lover and seasoned killer follows her heart, believing the only way she can overcome temptation is to give into it.

I had been seeing Charlotte for three years, after serendipity transformed an opportunistic hunt into a discussion. During that time, I sometimes imagined consuming her in an orgy of lust or attempting to turn her, as if I might hold onto her forever.

Now, as the ocean appeared like a second star field in motion, its blue depths rippling with black waves, it occurred to me that we don’t live in an ocean of time but only in island moments. More than most people, I could fully live each moment, because that was all I really had. I was immortal, but only Charlotte possessed eternity.

We kissed hesitantly, and she trembled until our awkward touches evolved into an intoxicated harmony of appetites. Her lips clenched mine, and her warm breaths caressed my cheek. I pressed my lips to hers and then spread her mouth to taste her moisture. She slowly dropped to the ground and I followed, until we lay together in the sand some distance from the ocean.  

The fresh scents of her shampoo and perfume couldn’t hide the smell of sweat made sweet by her day in the sun. I kissed the exquisite taste from her cheek and chin and worked my way down.

Cooing my name, she tipped her head back and her breath caught beneath my gentle bites. Saliva spilled from my lips when I realized I had her carotid. My fangs descended and my thoughts scattered. My senses scattered, too, so I was unsure what was most real: the hollow in my stomach, the longing between my legs, or the constriction that made it difficult to breathe. Releasing her throat, I struggled with love so intimately bruising, my chest ached.

I wanted to possess her, to make her love me and no one else. Mine was the love of death–love that accrues, dominates, and controls. The love of life heals and liberates, seeks meaning and connection. This was the love Charlotte possessed, or maybe it possessed her. As I let go of dying circumstances, a new mystery absorbed the world, making my touches about pleasing more than pleasure, but the clarity I cherished was gone from her gaze. That keen-eyed awareness was behind a wall of arousal, which strangely disappointed me.

People who need to watch this video...

On the last day of our trip we couldn’t help but overhear a conversation on the trolley (Pigeon Forge’s bus) as we were headed back to our car.  Three ladies who had just finished shopping at the Tanger Outlet Mall were sitting across from us chatting about someone they all knew.  I didn’t really pay much attention until one lady said, “… and here she comes in a three piece suit!”  This lady when on to say that the parents of this little girl were going to regret letting her wear boys clothes and play with “boy’s” toys.  She also went on to convey that the parents were bad parents because they were not “guiding” their child to be more “girly.”  Then she announced that she would not buy the girl, boy clothes or toys.  The other two ladies went on in agreement with the first woman.  One went so far as to say that the young girl’s parents were encouraging her to be a “dyke.”  Clay and I both were a little stunned and thought about saying something, but we both opted not to start an argument with people on public transportation that wouldn’t care or understand what we were saying…

So what if the child wants to wear boy’s clothes and be a tomboy?  First of all there are three piece suits made for women.  Also little kids are all shaped the same until puberty… so the clothes are all pretty much cut the same, just different colors… Well unless you want to dress your elementary student up like a miniature hoochie…  Ok now being a girl who happens to like boy stuff does not automatically make her lesbian potential.  I like boy stuff and clothes, I always have.  I have a male partner and a child with that partner.  Though my partner isn’t a traditional male… I don’t think I fit these ladies’ definition of a lesbian.  Second, if this girl these catty women were talking about did turn out to be a lesbian and/or a crossdresser, the parents did not make her that way.  You cannot make a person gay or straight, cd or not.  It is an integral part of who they are and has always been there.  Lastly… a person is the same person you know and love no matter what they wear or whom they find attractive.

Diversity in Health and Care 2009 (Vol. 9 No. 3)

Fade Fave: Improving lesbian, gay and bisexual healthcare: a systematic review of qualitative literature from the UK

Fade Skinny: There is evidence that lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) individuals have poorer experiences of health care compared with the general population but the causes are not entirely clear. The authors carried out a systematic review to examine the experience of health care provision in the UK for LGB patients. The article identifies the following areas as important for improving health service provision: Protocols; confidentiality, LGB-friendly resources and GP training.

A copy of this article is available from Fade Library

Sundays with Jerry; the Gods Must Be Crazy.

After this Sunday’s exploits at the Anchorage Baptist Temple, I’m left with an uncomfortable level of nausea, disappointment, and anxiety about what might still be in store for the 38th Pastoral Celebration of Jerry Prevo, this coming weekend.

First off, have you ever had a church service take attendance? If that isn’t strange enough, has a reverend ever invited you to his VIP room to get to know you? And how many religious jokes came to mind just then? Well, check this bit out from Sunday:

Weird. Then again, as prominent as Prevo has been during his 38 year reign, he has reportedly lost quite a chunk of attendance, and this type of rhetoric has been commonplace over the past couple of months.

But how about this call to action, featured in a picture displayed right on the ABT website? This doesn’t look much like a bible study group. This looks like open enlistment, in a time where tensions already run deep enough to cause concern. Anyone here read anything about the Crusades, and how well that worked out? Can we ban the concept of reenactments, please?

The stomach turning sensation came into play when Reverend Glenn Clary was introduced this past Sunday, to advertise the big 38 Pastoral Anniversary event. Rev. Clary is one of ABT’s ministers and holds leadership roles, according to their website, in the areas of Administration and Maintenance. He also was a cosponsor of a 2007 statewide advisory vote, run by the Alaska Family Council’s Jim Minnery, which sought to reaffirm the Constitutional Amendment defining marriage in Alaska as between a man and a woman.

In addition, humorously, he runs the ABT’s Marriage Builders’ Adult Bible Fellowship, which according to their webpage:

“[P]rovides married couples a unique setting to learn Scriptural insights that apply to daily married life. Our class is multi-generational with couples from all walks of life, races, and socio-economic levels who are committed to growing in faith and reaching the lost for Jesus Christ. Everyone is welcome to experience the tremendous work God is doing in and through the Marriage Builders’ Class. Our social interaction activities provide everyone an awesome opportunity to enjoy great Christian fellowship and build friendships lasting a lifetime. Connect with us on Sundays at 9:45 a.m. in the cafeteria for Christ-centered, Biblically based teaching on marriage, money, family, friends, relationships, and religion.”

He is also, apparently, very proud of the charge Reverend Prevo led to fend off the vast liberal media and their homosexual armies. This is the video that hurts, but I think needs to be seen. Over and over again. Because it’s real, and it’s in our town. It’s our responsibility and reality to deal with.

Just to be very clear, when he talks of “love offerings,” he is talking about money. He is legitimately asking this congregation to buy Jerry and Carrol Prevo gifts. And he asks people to pray about what kind of gifts will adequately satisfy the love which parishioners should have for their fearless, gay-fighting leader. The good Reverend Prevo, himself, later talks about worshiping false idols. But, clearly, we should keep these two ideas separate. Like church and state, or Glenn Beck and Thomas Paine.

And then comes the man himself. Jerry Prevo. Incoherent, rambling, Sarah Palin-esque, he fumbled his way through another fear based lecture that referenced Revelations and Deuteronomy, stressed the end of days, focused on Scarred Earth and burning in Hell, and managed to work in stabs at Social Security, claims that homosexuality is an abomination, and the thought that going to church should take the front seat, while taking care of your newborn child could actually serve as a detriment to your commitment to your faith.

Mayor Sullivan, I will repeat that I asked you, back in June, at a town hall in my neighborhood of Fairview, to stand up to Prevo. I implored you to realize that the future of Anchorage needs to be a vibrant, diverse, and inclusive community. You said nothing, nodded, and months later sided with the people in these videos. You are making a lot of mistakes. But, in terms of legacy, is this the tie in which you wish to bind yourself? Do you really watch these things and hear these claims and nod in vacant agreement with many of the people in these videos? Do you truly want to be remembered as the Jerry Lewis to Prevo’s Dean Martin (and I apologize to Dean Martin for the analogy)?

We live in the age of Wikipedia. How do you want to live in infamy, sir? Because, as much as I am angry with you over your decisions thus far, I don’t want to believe this is your core. I think that you are siding with a base that has been historically safe and in the majority, but also has become impossible to ignore as wrong, and shrinking in size if not voice.

The Anchorage Baptist Church will never be your dream of unified support. They will abandon you the second you hint of dissent. They have no recognition or respect for your office; God’s law as interpreted by the ABT’s leadership is the only doctrine of substance to them.

What will it take for you to learn this lesson?

… And what happens next weekend?

How we three came to be (part 2)

(I found this image on Photobucket. Anyone know what it’s from?)

Where did we leave off? Oh, right. Kate and I had experienced our first evening of frisky, lusting, grinding – and I couldn’t quite gather up the balls to confess to Jack.

Nearly a week passed. I don’t think I breathed the entire time. Kate, myself, and the kids met up at a park and kind-of sort-of talked it out. It was a stomach-knotting mixture of being happy to be together, and yet being totally unsure of each other.

Very reminiscent of being in junior high and having a crush on someone. You notice everything: how close to you they sit, the color of their eyes, their body langauage…you decipher every word looking for clues until they lose meaning altogether.

The following Friday Kate invited us over for dinner in her new place. She’s a fabulous cook, yet I could barely eat. Instead I tried to ease my nerves with wine, which ended up working a little too well.

Late into the evening we retired to the bedroom to watch a ‘movie.’ Jack had wanted to leave earlier, but grew suspicious when I was so insistent on staying. Of course, he was right to be suspicious. Just being around Kate again had me so worked up I couldn’t think straight.

We lay, snuggled in her bed, with myself in the middle. No one watched the movie.

Instead, I made my move (in part to let Kate know I was interested, and in part to let Jack know what was going on. I couldn’t seem to get the words out of my mouth to tell him anything – and so I decided to just show him).

I put my hand on Kate’s knee and traced with one finger up and down her thigh. She responded by taking her finger and tracing from my collar bone down to my clothed nipple.

I giggled a bit – and Jack said, “I can see what you’re doing.” To which I replied, “I know. Good.”

From there Kate and I got more comfortable, and began kissing and rubbing each other’s breasts. She is not a shy person normally, and becomes even less so when turned on.

Jack lay on the edge of the bed, observing. I asked him a few times if he was ok, if “this” was ok…and he would chuckle a bit bewilderedly and say, “don’t let me stop you now.”

Soon Kate and I were both topless and getting a bit frenzied. The heat and desire between us grew so quickly I felt dizzy. She climbed on top of me and straddled me, our legs intertwined, pussies rubbing together through our soft pants.

I couldn’t last any longer, and came in waves as she ground against me. Knowing what had happened she lay back down on the bed next to me, then grabbed my hand and put it between her legs. Even from the outside of her pants I could feel her warm, damp heat.

I stroked her as best I could from there, but soon felt frustrated and slipped my fingers into her waistband and into her panties. She gasped a tiny bit in suprise and pleasure, then moved her hips to meet my hand.

With one finger, and then another, I explored her hot wetness. I was amazed at the feeling, and suddenly thought, “so this is what guys can’t get enough of…now I’m starting to understand!”

I spent a few moments circling her clit with my fingers, but could tell she was aching to get off. I slipped two fingers inside of her and stroked, while pressing against her clit with the palm of my hand.

I wasn’t at all sure that I knew what I was doing, but my instincts proved to be good when she came moments later.

Suddenly I became aware once again that we were not alone in the bed. I turned to Jack, who had a hell of a smirk on his face, and asked if he wanted to have some fun with me. He tried to politely refuse (I guess thinking that having sex in front of Kate would be weird – but really, what kind of social graces does a situation such as this call for anyway?), but soon was coaxed into slipping off his pants.

Already hard as a rock from the show we’d only slightly intentionally put on, Jack was ready to go. He stood me up, stripped down my pants and underwear, and tossed me back onto the bed.

I laughed, then turned to Kate, and asked her if this was ok with her. She answered with a bit of a smile and a sincere, “Yes.” We began kissing and playing with each other’s tits again, while Jack climbed in behind me.

I maneuvered myself so I was on my hands and knees on top of Kate, and Jack came around behind me. He pressed the head of his cock onto my pussy, which was still so wet. He thrust into me slowly and smoothly as my muscles tightened around his shaft.

His pace quickened, and I began to feel the workings of another orgasm coming. Kate sucked on my nipple and reached down with one hand to rub my clit and Jack continued to fuck me at a strong, steady pace.

All of the stimulation at once was too much for me to last, and I began to cum. As often happens between us, my spasming muscles tipped Jack over the edge and he came as well, letting out a gutteral groan of pleasure.

We rested for a few minutes, then dressed again and said some awkward but happy good-bye’s. I was relieved to have Jack know my secret, and in some sense of the word, have given us his blessing. Ha!

More to come on the Jill/Jack/Kate story soon!

Photos: bing.com

Vera Vision—Masquerade Ballin’, Pt 1.

When Tawny’s husband mentioned he wanted to spice up their sex life, she didn’t think an orgy was what he had in mind.

It was a Friday night. The sky was clear and if one tried hard enough, they could see all the constellations. Tawny was stuck working on a major deadline for her company and was trying her hardest to finish it so she can at least have a late dinner. Completing the project an hour later, Tawny arrived home from a long day at work. She was exhausted, hungry and didn’t have any plans other than to veg out on her sofa, catching up with her shows. However, her husband, Oleg, had other plans. He left a big wrapped box at the doorstep with just a tiny note attached: Put this on and meet me at 2650 Market Street.
Keep your mind open and your options available.

Tawny quickly unwrapped the box and saw a dress that left little to the imagination. A slinky black number that was low-cut and high-cut up her thighs. Suddenly, Tawny was no longer tired and exhausted but quite curious as to what Oleg had in store for her. She assumed it was going to be a nightclub based on the dress. Shaking her head and muttering how tired she was to be out dancing, Tawny followed Oleg’s instructions and put the dress on. She freshened up her look by adding a bit of makeup and putting her long hair in a bun. Then she was off to her unknown destination.

Carefully following the GPS guide, Tawny pulled up to a palatial estate. She double-checked to see if she had the correct address. Sure enough, it was. As she pulled up to the gated entrance, the gates automatically opened. Still unsure, Tawny carefully drove her Corolla inside, alert of any suspicious activity. She followed the curve to the front of the mansion and was in awe. Everything she had read in books and seen in magazines was right before her very eyes. And Tawny felt she was completely out of place. What was a city girl like her doing at a private residence? Who did Oleg know at that place?

All questions were answered when she saw her husband walk out of the front doors, smiling. He was wearing a business suit with an open collar. Clearly, he knew something she didn’t. Tawny turned off the car and greeted him, questioning who he knew and why he was there. Oleg simply shrugged off Tawny’s questions and led her inside. If Tawny thought the mansion was gorgeous on the outside, nothing compared to how it looked on the inside. 17th century art work and antique furniture adorned the mansion. Exquisite lighting was provided by various chandeliers every few feet. The wall paint color was shiny dulce de leche, making the glamour stand out even more. It was fit for royalty. It was fit for the very rich. It was fit for people who were not Tawny and Oleg.

Oleg grabbed two masks and put them on him and Tawny. Once again, Tawny gave him a puzzled look but Oleg just brushed her off. He grabbed two glasses of champagne from a passing waiter and handed one to his wife, who quickly downed hers. Oleg smiled and gave his glass to Tawny. He rubbed her back and kissed her temple, silently assuring her to trust him. Tawny let out a sigh and finally relaxed. She still didn’t know what the hell was going on but was willing to try to enjoy her night. Oleg grabbed her hand and led her through the mansion. Walking through the halls, the familiar noises of moaning and screaming indicated there was more to the masquerade ball than what met her eye. She passed by a room and saw a threesome. She passed by another one and saw two women 69′ing each other with a crowd of men watching. She passed through several more rooms with similar scenes and situations. It didn’t take long for Tawny to realize why she was dressed sexily and the mask on her face.

She was going to get fucked that night. It was just a matter by whom….

*Above model is Jessica Drue; photography is by model mayhem/toxic imaging*

Addict

Yes, I’ve been a little whore. I’m a self proclaimed Slut. I try to have class about it. My dear ***man whom I had only graced my sexual skills on by giving him head about a month ago, was invited to a mutual gathering. Needless to say we stumbled back to mine and used two out of the three condoms he had bought in his pocket as ‘preparation’. The sex was ok, nothing to scream home about, and the weird thing was, he shaved his chest hair? i’m still confused. I don’t understand why a guy would do that? Anyway, he was damn good at making me cum with his fingers deep inside me. I milked that as often as I could.

The following evening, I have always dreamt about Marrying a Canadian. The closest I have was fucking an American. And the Canadians are good. I haven’t proceeded to fuck him yet, I’m sure that will happen tonight. But he went down on me. And I have now discovered the 3rd person in the world who can make me cum through it. I was again also honored later that night with ‘best headjob I’ve ever had in my life!’ – his words. Oh how they echo the many men before him. I pride myself on being able to bring a man to cum on my command. My Boyfriend also taught me how to give a damn good Hand Job a few weeks ago so I’m starting to incorporate that into my already action packed 10minutes of mouth pleasure.

Canadian tasted good. And he kissed me long and hard right after I swallowed. I like a man who’s not afraid of his own dirties. He liked to pull my hair. Which I’m sure I get more satisfaction out of it then he does. Tonight I’m trying to try have a threesome with him. I’m on the hunt out of the many women I come across, to find one willing to let me tenderly peel their lacy’s off with my tongue, allow me to slide my fingers inside and play with her ass as my tastebuds flick long and hard over her clit, all the while, I’m getting fucked from behind.
I’m trying to find her, buts it a hard job to accomplish.

My Canadian likes to circle my clit with the tip of his fingers, He sure knows how to get a girls pussy pumping. He wanted some intimacy this morning. Something I only save for my boyfriend. He was politely refused.

Tonight I have my ‘crush’ coming over for some joints. There’s undeniable sexual tension. Oh how I would love to rip his clothes off and have him thrust into me with mad passion and fire in his eyes. He is a fisherman. A hot, Sexy, smooth Fisherman. Someone I would take home to marry. Pity I’m only here to fuck. I think he might be somewhat inhibited in the bedroom. I can’t wait to find out, teach him, blow his mind… and cock..

I’m trying to get this blog on my i-phone, So I can update with any action.

PS: I Think I’m a sex addict.

It's Back! Crazy Sex Porn Spoof Nut Busters.

It’s Back! Crazy Sex Porn Spoof Nut Busters.

Our detectives go deep undercover in this explosive, sex packed Miami Spice Episode. When detective Chubbs and Cockit are asked to investigate Faulderon, a dangerous drug lord who just came into town looking action, they find themselves pulled into the lethal world of drugs, money, and women. Our undercover girl Tina was willing to go all the way in order to earn trust with Faulderon, and that means let him fuck her brains out. Dont miss a single minute of this amazing episode of Miami Spice.  Join here!

www.sexxx300.wordpress.com

 

dating

for the record dating is overrated..why? well i don’t think i’m really good at it! oh, i’ll warn you now, my moods may seem a little scattered, i tend to be a little emotional on paper.

yeah so, people are always like..date it’s fun. yes, there are moments..but i liken it to emotional purgotory..it’s that special place where you get to be emotionally aloof and it’s cool, all wrapped up in some charm!

you don’t know where it’s going? if it’s going? does she like me, has she changed her mind, oh! she does like me, you can’t like her too much or too little, don’t be needy – EVER, don’t assume, don’t be too available, but don’t ignore her.. all that wrapped into a super-cooled persona…i mean really..*laughing*

and like 80% of the time your pre-occupied with this..does that sound like fun.

maybe, i’m doing it wrong, because the alternative i know more about than i care to..*wink*

anywho, yeah dating..not my thing. every date that i have gone on ultimately ended in some type of relationship or ended. i’m what some refer to as a serial monogomist. something about sex, feelings and time equal relationship in my crazy-assed mind, go figure.

maybe i’m a romantic idealist at heart. perhaps i’m striving for something that is too rare to seek. perhaps i should just let everything be, not push or pull. i’ve come to realize the last statement is the best method.

i got it the buddhist method of dating..let’s see

the eightfold path of dating (note: the eightfold path is the eight principles Buddhists live their life to end suffering. Isn’t that the point, no more lonely nights, over exercised fingers and worn out dildo’s, with xtube and tango wire in heavy rotation..i’m saying you know what I mean.

the eight fold path is

right view – Right view is the beginning and the end of the path, it simply means to see and to understand things as they really are..

right view in the eightfold path of dating, stay present in the moment..stop fantasizing and focus on reality. don’t let your desire color your perception of things. very important, make sure you aren’t buying the commercial, but the real.

right intention – While right view refers to the cognitive aspect of wisdom, right intention refers to the volitional aspect, i.e. the kind of mental energy that controls our actions.

simple what are your intentions, goals, what do you want and how is it influencing your dating life. for example if you want a relationship don’t date unavailable women. if you do, then maybe you should analyze your intentions.

right speech – Right speech is the first principle of ethical conduct in the eightfold path, for example – Positively phrased, this means to tell the truth, to speak friendly, warm, and gently and to talk only when necessary.

i think that one is self-explanatory, but for the sake of consistency…truth is very important when getting to know someone i.e. dating. if they don’t know you, then they can never really ‘like’ or best case scenario ‘love’ you.

right action – Positively formulated, right action means to act kindly and compassionately, to be honest, to respect the belongings of others, and to keep sexual relationships harmless to others.

treat her right and be honest or bounce!

right livelihood – Right livelihood means that one should earn one’s living in a righteous way and that wealth should be gained legally and peacefully.

humm, this one was a little harder to drawn an analogy from..ok got one. don’t date a drug dealer or murderer..it will fuck-up your chi, credit, you may end up in jail, etc. etc.

right effort – Right effort can be seen as a prerequisite for the other principles of the path. Without effort, which is in itself an act of will, nothing can be achieved, whereas misguided effort distracts the mind from its task, and confusion will be the consequence.

you get what you put into it, collectively. you can bring lemons/water and she brings salt and you’ve got on nasty-ass drink. simply stated you both have to be on the same page with the same goals, apply the same care and blah, blah, blah into it. you feel me!

right mindfulness – Right mindfulness is the controlled and perfected faculty of cognition. It is the mental ability to see things as they are, with clear consciousness

practice makes perfect, if your dating that means you haven’t perfected ‘faculty of cognition’ it means something has ended, and something is beginning. depending on how present and accepting you are in your moments, allow yourself to be accept the truths revealed..this will determine whether you are seeing things as they truly are. simply, don’t kid yourself, you know if it’s going somewhere or not, or if you want it to go anywhere at all.

right concentration – Right concentration for the purpose of the eightfold path means wholesome concentration, i.e. concentration on wholesome thoughts and actions.

my favorite, positive thinking always. the glass is half full, everything happens for a reason, there is always a lesson to be learned. nothing happens in a vacuum. i think you get it!

So this is my lay attempt at applying the eightfold path to your dating life! Oh, also a friend once revealed to me when dating it doesn’t always have to go somewhere..how do you feel about! It is what it is! i will reserve my opinion about this comment for another post.

Cheers!