dating

for the record dating is overrated..why? well i don’t think i’m really good at it! oh, i’ll warn you now, my moods may seem a little scattered, i tend to be a little emotional on paper.

yeah so, people are always like..date it’s fun. yes, there are moments..but i liken it to emotional purgotory..it’s that special place where you get to be emotionally aloof and it’s cool, all wrapped up in some charm!

you don’t know where it’s going? if it’s going? does she like me, has she changed her mind, oh! she does like me, you can’t like her too much or too little, don’t be needy – EVER, don’t assume, don’t be too available, but don’t ignore her.. all that wrapped into a super-cooled persona…i mean really..*laughing*

and like 80% of the time your pre-occupied with this..does that sound like fun.

maybe, i’m doing it wrong, because the alternative i know more about than i care to..*wink*

anywho, yeah dating..not my thing. every date that i have gone on ultimately ended in some type of relationship or ended. i’m what some refer to as a serial monogomist. something about sex, feelings and time equal relationship in my crazy-assed mind, go figure.

maybe i’m a romantic idealist at heart. perhaps i’m striving for something that is too rare to seek. perhaps i should just let everything be, not push or pull. i’ve come to realize the last statement is the best method.

i got it the buddhist method of dating..let’s see

the eightfold path of dating (note: the eightfold path is the eight principles Buddhists live their life to end suffering. Isn’t that the point, no more lonely nights, over exercised fingers and worn out dildo’s, with xtube and tango wire in heavy rotation..i’m saying you know what I mean.

the eight fold path is

right view – Right view is the beginning and the end of the path, it simply means to see and to understand things as they really are..

right view in the eightfold path of dating, stay present in the moment..stop fantasizing and focus on reality. don’t let your desire color your perception of things. very important, make sure you aren’t buying the commercial, but the real.

right intention – While right view refers to the cognitive aspect of wisdom, right intention refers to the volitional aspect, i.e. the kind of mental energy that controls our actions.

simple what are your intentions, goals, what do you want and how is it influencing your dating life. for example if you want a relationship don’t date unavailable women. if you do, then maybe you should analyze your intentions.

right speech – Right speech is the first principle of ethical conduct in the eightfold path, for example – Positively phrased, this means to tell the truth, to speak friendly, warm, and gently and to talk only when necessary.

i think that one is self-explanatory, but for the sake of consistency…truth is very important when getting to know someone i.e. dating. if they don’t know you, then they can never really ‘like’ or best case scenario ‘love’ you.

right action – Positively formulated, right action means to act kindly and compassionately, to be honest, to respect the belongings of others, and to keep sexual relationships harmless to others.

treat her right and be honest or bounce!

right livelihood – Right livelihood means that one should earn one’s living in a righteous way and that wealth should be gained legally and peacefully.

humm, this one was a little harder to drawn an analogy from..ok got one. don’t date a drug dealer or murderer..it will fuck-up your chi, credit, you may end up in jail, etc. etc.

right effort – Right effort can be seen as a prerequisite for the other principles of the path. Without effort, which is in itself an act of will, nothing can be achieved, whereas misguided effort distracts the mind from its task, and confusion will be the consequence.

you get what you put into it, collectively. you can bring lemons/water and she brings salt and you’ve got on nasty-ass drink. simply stated you both have to be on the same page with the same goals, apply the same care and blah, blah, blah into it. you feel me!

right mindfulness – Right mindfulness is the controlled and perfected faculty of cognition. It is the mental ability to see things as they are, with clear consciousness

practice makes perfect, if your dating that means you haven’t perfected ‘faculty of cognition’ it means something has ended, and something is beginning. depending on how present and accepting you are in your moments, allow yourself to be accept the truths revealed..this will determine whether you are seeing things as they truly are. simply, don’t kid yourself, you know if it’s going somewhere or not, or if you want it to go anywhere at all.

right concentration – Right concentration for the purpose of the eightfold path means wholesome concentration, i.e. concentration on wholesome thoughts and actions.

my favorite, positive thinking always. the glass is half full, everything happens for a reason, there is always a lesson to be learned. nothing happens in a vacuum. i think you get it!

So this is my lay attempt at applying the eightfold path to your dating life! Oh, also a friend once revealed to me when dating it doesn’t always have to go somewhere..how do you feel about! It is what it is! i will reserve my opinion about this comment for another post.

Cheers!