I’m going to keep this short and to the point.
Friday was Transgender Day of Remembrance and I attended the vigil in my area. I had such an intense Thursday night, and got very little sleep going into Friday. During the day on Friday, I had meeting after meeting and seriously didn’t now if I was even going to be able to muster up the energy to go to the event that evening. I knew I would be something powerful, and since it was my first TDOR I figured I really did have to go. I went home and grabbed my camera and went to meet up with some friends before heading over to the church.
I’m not sure if I purposefully distanced myself, but I went into complete photographer mode. I didn’t really let myself process what was going on in front of me. The service at the church was nice. Completely non denominational, just a time for some community members to get up and speak. After that, we lit candles and walked through Rita Hester’s neighborhood. It was eerie making that walk with all those people and all those candles. It’s a walk I have made so many times, and I never thought about Rita or her death in combination with those streets. We all gathered at an open square to stand in solidarity while community members read the name and a short description of each victim that passed away this year at the hand of someone else, due to discrimination and hatred.
I stood there, and listened, and took pictures. After all of the names, far too many names, were read we walked back to the church. At the church there was a reception with hot apple cider and cookies and treats. Once we got back to the church, I pulled away and sat by myself for a while. I tried to make small talk with some people, but I just felt numb.
Pretty soon after, a friend of mine gave me a ride home. That night was really tough for me. I sat, and finally processed all of the emotion that I wasn’t able to process at the event. I think a lot of my emotional release had to do with my own identity, and the fact that I can’t hide from myself any more.
I spent all day developing and scanning the negatives I took on Friday. So far, it looks like I have about 40 frames that I am happy with. A bit more tweaking and editing and I should be able to get them up online and share them with the community.
Love.
Goddess Lacey
No comments:
Post a Comment